Mixing business with pleasure…

Picture this…you’re in an office or casual work setting and all you see is one of your co-workers that you’re sexually and physically attracted to. They throw hints that they’re feeling you too and your mind is racing like, “I’m going in.” All of a sudden you snap back into reality when people are starting to take notice of something possibly going on. Your fantasy is put on hold for the time being until you figure out how or if you’re going to pursue.

If you’re contemplating a workplace relationship of any kind, let me be the first to tell you it’s a hell of an experience, depending on how you look at it. It’s easy to say that you would never do it because you’ve heard terrible stories from your friends, family, whoever. Their story may have some validation but in the end you’re not them and they’re not you. There are some things to consider if you decide to pursue a workplace relationship. You could possibly compromise your work environment and career especially if your co-worker is showing you special treatment. You need to know how to handle it and learn to keep business separate. If you are not able to handle it emotionally, pursuing him or her may not be worth it. Also your privacy is out the window once people find out because, they will find out. Lastly, think about the risks involved from losing your job to be ridiculed. If things don’t work out, you are now in an awkward situation where you have to see and interact with this person daily.

I remember I was digging on this guy and we were seen with each other openly at work, holding hands and flirting. I would constantly hear “are you dating so and so” or “be careful with him”. Things were great for a short period of time until he didn’t want me anymore. I wasn’t mentally mature enough to handle the situation at the time and started to despise him. I allowed him to embarrass me at work plus everyone knew our business. Now instead of us coming into work looking blissful like we used to, he acted real nonchalant towards me and as if I didn’t exist while I looked dumbfounded at work. I eventually got over it and luckily we didn’t have sex so there wasn’t much to lose.

I had a similar experience with another guy but we were intimate. I got “my first” a job at the same retail store as me. It was fun to work with him but that got old quick. Knowing we weren’t together I would get upset every time I saw a female talking to him or vice versa. One night at work I was standing at the front waiting to greet customers as they came in and he walked past with a girl on his shoulder. He spoke to my manager that was working but ignored me as if he didn’t see me. I immediately felt my stomach drop and ran to the back to pull myself together. There was no basis to our relationship outside of us having been intimate that one time. Once again I didn’t know how to handle that situation and I was 0-2. All in all, I didn’t get the outcome I wanted but the experiences are what I enjoyed most.

Simple words of advice: if you’re going to pursue, keep in mind the negative implications that could come with it. Know what you’re looking for and make sure you can handle the end result. There are rare occasions where great things come out of mixing business with pleasure but not all the time. Either way, proceed with caution. If it’s just the experience you want, buckle up and enjoy the ride without any regrets.